Only Cheryl and Derek Hough know whether or not they may be playing hide the sausage, but it seems Katy Perry may hypothetically, possibly, going-by-her-words-but-not-actions be up for a bit of a nibble.

Talking to Q Magazine (not actually at a copy of the mag, that’d be odd), Katy politely nixed the possibility of a bit of a fumble with Simon Cowell, focussing her attentions on Cheryl instead. What, no love for Dannii? Or Louis?

“The most gorgeous judge is Cheryl Cole,” she went off on a slight, and seemingly unprompted, tangent.

“That woman is just edible. She kept calling me… what was it? Popette?… “You’re a popette.” She kept saying that to me. Is that a compliment? It is? I love Cheryl. She’s got a whole other version of English going on.”

Us Britishers call it Geordie. Most people believe it to be a form of English, but we’re not entirely sure.

“Edible”, hmmm? So that means you could eat her? That’s what it means, isn’t it, hmmm? Otherwise you wouldn’t say “edible”. That’s what “edible” means, isn’t it, hmmm? We got a live one!

That sounds RUDE. Unless Katy Perry has cannibalistic leanings – which of course, she doesn’t – so, we wonder, how would you take your Cheryl, KP?

That’s not code for something weird. Or a suggestion that Katy reuses her old serviettes like grandma reuses teabags. It is an acknowledgement of her dining accessory party trick.

“My father taught me how to make breasts with a napkin, and I picked up making a dick all by myself. It’s a cool thing to roll out when you are wearing a gown at a posh dinner.”

“They think you’re making a rabbit and then you do a few more twists and folds and, Oooh, they get a cock! Awesome!”

LOVE LOVE LOVE this girl <3 Can't wait for Teenage Dream! And certainly can't wait to see her chemistry with Cheryl.

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